The Continuing Adventures of SuperDonk - poker "idiot"!!!

OK, I wrote earlier in the week regarding a person that I referred to as "SuperDonk" that I came across in the poker room. This wasn't his screen name at the poker room. It was one that I made up for him. After last night, I am beginning to think that SuperDonk is not a person, but perhaps a spirit that infests the body of an online poker player of choice for a given session. Sidenote, I think Super Donk is lazy, as it seems that he only possesses the virtual image of players from oh, say the UK --- like London specifically --- no offense to our UK readers here. I'm going to have to hire an artist to draw me a picture of this Super Donk ghost/character, as I slightly suspect he's gonna be cast a recurring role in the pub. With that said, onto our next episode of "SuperDonk builds bankrolls!"

(used car salesman/cheesy cartoon voiceover) - "When we last left off, SuperDonk was battling the evil forces of the TAG Drunk Dude. SuperDonk used his Super Powers throwing chip after chip in the pot, in hopes of capturing and running down our evil drunken fiend. However, the evil villian, Beer Dude KNEW Super Donk had a weakness. The evil one set trap after trap for our hero on the river, causing SuperDonk to become weak, trembling with fear and folding his hand... Will SuperDonk avoid the river trap? Stay tuned...!!!

SuperDonk: "We meet again, Drunk guy with chips. Don't you know justice always prevails?"

Beer Dude: "If you're to defeat me and my evil chip stack, you'll need to do better than see 92% of the flops. I'll walk all over your any two cards playing ass... Wait, you're the donkey, thus an ass. So, I'll walk all over your any two cards playing self and declare victory on behalf of the evil TAG empire. How ya like them apples, ya jackass?"

SuperDonk: "I'm not afraid of you, Beer Guy. You're forgetting something."

Beer Dude: "Oh yea, I am... sorry, let me reword. How ya like them apples, ya SUPER Jackass?"

SuperDonk: "Very funny evil 1. No, you forgot we're playing in my home turf. I'm not afraid of your river bet, providing we're playing for........ British pounds!!!"

Beer Dude: "No!!!! You'll never beat me you horses' ass, errr Donkey. Fold to my River Bet!!!"

SuperDonk: "Never! I show you the power of... the Jack-three!"

BeerDude (breaking character): "Are you f'ing kidding me? We're gonna get cancelled if you show down hands like that, Donk boy. Seriously, we're gonna get cancelled."

SuperDonk (also breaking character):"Well, what if I play 96% of the flops and go to showdown on all of them, would that help?"

Voiceover:"Stay tuned for next week when superdonk says..." "10-4offsuit is a great starting hand, you fiend!!!"

Haha, I know, cheesy. But this dude was by far the donk of all donks.

Stats are as follows for said hero superdonk over 87 hands:

Voluntarily put money in pot: 97% (rounded down)
Folded small/big blind to steal: 0% and 0%
win rate per 100 hands: -137 POUNDS

I'm not real sure this guy can be outdone. Funny thing is, people would actually fold to this clown. Everyone at the table saw what I was doing. All I needed was a piece of the flop, and I'd show down against him. I'd beat on him for a while (for a bit with any two cards), then sit back and let others take a run at him. He'd bet into them and they'd fold. Once they were frustrated and his bankroll built up a bit, I'd take another run at him. It was truely an amazing evening. I'll sit with this clown anytime, plus, I got the script for the SuperDonk pilot I'm working on as well, so it will give me some material.